Being Single in the City: Pick Up Situations
Situation #6) Boston Boys gone wild
Location: Whiskey’s Bar
Allie & I were at Whiskeys in Boston with my friend Austin. As we were getting ready to leave, Austin excused himself to use the restroom. Within a second it was like vultures attacking their prey. Two different men approached us at the same time asking our names and what was our deal. The funniest part about this was these two men weren’t friends and both picked their prey. The guy that came to talk to me was from Texas and asked me about it. When Austin arrived back Allie and I couldn’t stop laughing. I told him he really couldn’t leave us alone in this town.
Pick Up Attempt: FAIL
Situation #5) Where is that glass slipper?
Location: AC Subway headed toward Fulton
After work I hopped onto the subway en route home. The second I step onto the subway car I hear, “Damn looks it my Cinderella.” I had my headphones in but not turned up. So I herd the rest of this mans plea… “ I wish I had a glass slipper that fit your fine foot.” “Oh my Cinderella, what is you name.” Hahah then I hopped off at my stop, which thank god, was the next stop.
Pick Up Attempt: FAIL
Situation #4) vous parlez français
Location: Webster Hall
After getting VIP, Melissa and I sat next to this man named Christof. When I say man, I mean that because he was probably 35. So he didn’t speak a lick on English, but immediately offered Melissa and I drinks. Ha I attempted to communicate with him in Spanish thinking that he would know Spanish. He didn’t. So after that he offered me a ride in his limo and I respectfully declined.
Pick Up Attempt: FAIL
Situation #3) Jessica Simpson
Location: Bar next to Off the Wagon on McDougal Street.
“Jessica is that you? Damn girl you look just like Jessica Simpson, What is your name and Can I buy you a drink?” This man then also asked me if I dated black men. I paused, and before I could say anything his Meathead friend asked if I was racist. He interrupted me before I could speak and said One ruined it for all huh? Ha again I went for the less words are better approach. Meat head man then began to tell me if he would of know I wasn’t with the boys I was at the bar with he would’ve already bought me a drink.
Pick Up Attempt: FAIL
Situation #2) Hair Stroke
Location: Bar in Meatpacking District
So some guy stoked my hair while I was waiting at the bar for a drink, I turned around and ask “can I help you?” He said he loved my hair and just wanted to touch it. Then his buddies claimed he was a stylist. Well, I asked him if this was their normal pick up routine… he responded no. I told him he would have to act more flamboyant to pull off the gay hair stylist that is trying to hook up his friends at the bar. I wasn’t amused.
Pick Up Attempt: FAIL
Situation #1) The forward “Out -of-towner”
Location: M-5 Lounge in Tribeca
So I met a man named Josh at the M Lounge. He claimed he owned his own tree business. I don’t really know what kinds of shrubbery he was talking about and didn’t really care to know much more. Thank night I was drinking a water with lime. Well Josh approached me with a gin and tonic and said he noticed I was running low on my drink. We got to talking and he asked me in a concerned tone… So I’m just going to be forward here, how do you feel about going home with an out-of-towner?” Ha I laughed a bit and thanked him for the drink. In my head I was thinking wow, extremely forward. I ignored his question and kept talking with his friends.
Pick Up Attempt: FAIL